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dorothy and alic

Yes, it has been some week. To think that is one of seven things I did not even know about me. The gnome throwing. Seeing some weird shit oh yes. haven’t we all?

Firstly Lady Fury was upset about Tatler. It has taken her till today when I placed her on Pinterest with a board of other ladies in red gowns, for her to come down from the ceiling,  accept the blogger award I gave her and bestow upon the world her quite hidious paper doll…


As for me, well…the gnome throwing….into a flower bed too? What can I say except that I paid a visit here…

Citadel Banner

The home of the Mountain Lord of Chaos, who had this to say of it the following morning:-

Well, what a night! I fear I will be in the doghouse with Princess Ruby for quite some time. She told me that it would be the last time she frees me from police custody.

It all started when Shehanne Moore returned from white water rafting and insisted that Findl Nettlecrusher come to the village tavern with us. This was playing with fire, if ever there was. The gnomes are generally forbidden from fraternising with guests, and certainly not usually allowed in the tavern! Shehanne was most insistent, and my protests went unheeded.
To cut a long story short, what proceeded was one of the most raucus nights I have ever witnessed. It started with a drinking contest where great big jugs of whisky were quaffed in seconds. Poor Findl barely stood a chance. Next, we had a display of Highland Dancing on top of the bar in front of a crowd of astonished Rambling Club members.  Somehow a whole hog roast ended up in the fire, and the whole evening culminated in Findl being hurled head-first through a window, into the Mayor’s prize-winning flowerbed…………….

Come on Mountain Lord, I mean it could have been worse. At least I never got involved in  a rammy up Everest at 25 thou feet as some folks recently did. And Findle could still rise obviously as you can see from this picture I took. .gnome 1So there was no need for the Mountain Lord to be hustled off like this gnome2

to the nearest police cell.

Seriously, I have to say that the Citadel is a wonderful place. You get to white-water raft and everything.

gnome 3Okay so that flamingo came to grief, and the Lord Of Chaos, is actually  quite a pussy cat. I don’t tend to reblog things as a rule –no the edits on that other pussy cat the Black Wolf are done….Whoooh. I just want to share this. Mountain Lord has created a fabulous other world. And taken such trouble to ask several  other authors along this week. I was thrilled to get a place.  More of that. More of them at the end. Here’s the Q and A session that happened BEFORE that gnome got thrown.

We are extremely pleased you have journeyed to us in the Karkonose, Shehanne. Can you tell us something about the place where you usually dwell and your background?

 (well maybe he was but I doubt I will get back!!)

I am a miserable creature, oh mighty lord of the citadel, dwelling on wine in the miserable lande of ye Scots, north of ye Englande, north of ye sun…miles north in fact, where ye people dress in kilts, live in castles, eat ye strange dish called haggis and say ye hoots mon, for the benefit of ye tourists.  Ye aisles of ye shoppes are stocked with garden furniture of every description,  instead of gloves and hats for ye bloody Baltic  weather , ye beer-bellied men ponce about ye supermarket car-parks in ye shorts and ye open-toed sandals, at the first hint of sun.  And ye young demonstrate their drinking skills on ye streets on ye nightly basis.  Mountainous, so ye climb here has been nothing.

There dwell I in a house where you would be lucky to get a biscuit and ye younger daughter complained that last week she found a potato plant growing in a kitchen cupboard. pop

So you cannot imagine how glad I am to come here, oh master.

ML: There are many similarities between your home and ours methinks.

Ye Shehanne    Really?

Ye Mountain Lord….Are you enjoying your visit to the Citadel?

So long as Gnome Nettlecrusher understands when it comes to white water rafting he is looking at a being who nearly drowned in six inches of water. I am sure it will be very satisfactory. But if this tavern you speak so highly of, serves turnip ale, I think you will find my clog dancing skills are better. Especially upon the  nearest table. You have karaoke?

Tell us what is happening to you at the moment as a writer. Well, what is happening is that I am writing out a character and her clan for my second book. To think they survived hundreds of years of warfare, massacre and clearances, to meet with ye ed’s red pen.  But she is brill so…

Do you have anything exciting lined up for the future?

A night out in ye Dundee city centre is always very exciting.

We employ lots of gnomes here at the citadel. They are quite rambunctious and troublesome at times, and often refuse to work. Do you have any tips on looking after them?
Gnome throwing. Definitely.   Short of that make them go stand in someone’s garden with their rods for an entire afternoon.  Their fishing ones that is.  That will quieten them down. Either that or they will get nicked, then your problems will be solved.

gnome 5

 I have a long running feud with Vlad Dracula, who lives over in Transylvania. He thinks I stole his wife and will not let it lie. Do you any recommendations on how I should deal with the grumpy old curmudgeon?
Oh just send her back. You know all she does is complain and want you to count turnips anyway.  He is a curmudgeon. She is a curmudgeon. This is a match made in heaven…. Think of who else you could have, oh mighty master.  My own heroine would but require you to change one  letters of the name Ruby.
 My wife Ruby says I spend too much time in the local village and not enough time counting turnips for her. How can I keep her happy?
You see? You can’t.

I failed in my last attempt to unleash chaos on the world.  Can you think of a way I should employ my powers to redeem myself and make the world a better place?

Well, you’ve asked me and all these other writers on here.  What more is there?

ML: You could be right about this one.

So who is Mountain Lord..well fabulously imaginative and highly recommended. I’ve not such fun in yoinks. Oh to have to adjust to the non throwing gnome world again.


 And just look at some of the wonderful writers Mountain Lord featured recently.

Jonathon Mills author or The Witch of Glenaster


The Witch of Glenaster

Catherine Cavendish, author of Miss Abigail’s Room and The Second Wife http://mountain-lord.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/tea-and-biscuits-at-citadel-author.html


Steve Emmett, author of Diavolino http://mountain-lord.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/enjoying-tea-and-biscuits-at-citadel.html


Marie Egles Carhart on behalf of J.R.Egles, author of The Kabrini Message. http://mountain-lord.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/tea-and-biscuits-at-citadel-marie-egles.html


And I don’t think Monsieur le Chaotic Lord is finished yet. Not by a long chop of turnip neep.